Tuesday, August 30, 2011

Adult Truth #11

You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day.

Now this depends on your definition of productive. I mean, I personally consider studying the Fall TV Line Up productive. I have to make DVR arrangements. There are mathematical calculations involved.

Number of shows on a given night in a given hour or consecutive hour (because all shows are scheduled to record for five minutes after their scheduled end time – which did not help me on the VMAs, because they ran so far over it still cut off before The Hunger Games sneak peak.)

Number of shows total I can watch in a given week - Number of shows that Scott watches but doesn’t erase in a given week, thus causing me to go in at a later date and erase 10 Deadliest Catch, 7 Top Chef, and 13 My Super Sweet 16 (just kidding) all at once.

Number of hours available on my DVR given the fact that I am not allowed to remove certain items once they have been recorded, specifically from the Disney Channel.

That’s productive.

Going down to the Marriott, buying a Klondike bar and eating outside by the fountain while observing the Medical Mart construction…not so much.

Then again, there are certain things that I am required to do for my job that I also don’t consider productive, so maybe it all evens out in the end.

I guess we should only be nervous if this breaking point comes before lunch.

So for your viewing pleasure:

New Shows I’m Definitely Checking Out:
Up All Night and Free Agents (NBC sitcoms on Wednesday nights starting 9/14 and thankfully not conflicting with Modern Family)
2 Broke Girls (CBS sitcom on Monday starting 9/19 starring the girl from Nick and Norah’s Infinite Playlist)
New Girl (FOX sitcom on Tuesdays starting 9/20 starring Zooey Daeschenal who I love!)
Revenge (ABC drama on Wednesdays starting 9/21. It takes a very good pilot to get me hooked onto a drama, due to my television ADD.)
Whitney (NBC sitcom on Thursdays starting 9/22)
Suburgatory and How to Be a Gentleman (ABC sitcoms on Wednesdays starting 9/28. Hopefully, by the end of September I will have my Wednesday nights figured out, because adding these will put the DVR over the edge. But…hello? Kevin Dillon as a life coach? Sign me up.)

New Shows I Will Only Check Out if They Don’t Take Up DVR Real Estate:
Ringer (because Sarah Michelle GellarFKA Buffy…enough said)
Charlie’s Angels (because that’s how old I am)
A Gifted Man (because Patrick Wilson has been highly under-rated)
Pan Am (because I’ll try out a period show any day)
Terra Nova (because I’ll try out a SciFi show any day, too)

My Old DVR Setting Keepers:
Glee, Modern Family, Community (so excited they overlooked last year’s sophomore slump and kept this show on), and Boardwalk Empire.

Other Notable Items:
If October comes and I’m not out of my mind or DVR space, I may or may not check out: Homeland (Showtime), Hell on Wheels (AMC), Grimm (NBC), and Once Upon a Time (ABC)

Mario Lopez will be the host of a new hidden camera/reality show called H8R where he finds people that have gone on record as hating certain “celebrities” (using quotes because examples given are Snookie and Kim Kardashian) and arrange for these people to meet, giving the celebs a chance to change the “hater’s” mind. My question: Who the hell keeps giving this jock strap work? A.C. Slater, people! He still has a job while millions of Americans are on unemployment. Where is the justice?

I don’t watch Two and a Half Men, but I used to watch That 70’s Show. Do I think Ashton Kutcher can replace Charlie Sheen? I don’t know. Does his hair look bad in the promos? Most definitely.

I will not DVR it, but I will try to catch The Sing Off every now and again, if only to say hi to my good friend Nick Lachey (that’s for you, Leslie).

If you ever want to torture me, close me in a room and only play the following shows: CSI (any city), Law & Order (any unit), NCIS, Hawaii Five-O and Grey’s Anatomy.

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