(Stolen premise from the television show Community starring my secret crush Joel McHale.)
Zoe: Mischievous Cherub or Devil's Spawn? Debate.
Point: Short, painless labor and delivery.
Counterpoint: Has not stopped moving and making noise ever since.
Disclaimer: I don't consider the act of moving and making noise evil. Only in mass and unrelenting quantities or during diaper changes.
Point: Tenderly cares for all baby dolls in what is no doubt a reflection of her own mother's gentle and patient nature.
Counterpoint: Has been known to throw objects ten times her own weight and knock the glasses off her gentle mother's face.
Point: Shows the dog more attention and affection than possibly any other member of the family, including the allowance of sloppy St. Bernard kisses before bed.
Counterpoint: Has been spotted being dragged across the floor behind him because she won't let go of his tail.
(Also tends to take his dog food and throw it in his water bowl, but it has yet to be determined if she is doing this to be annoying or she thinks she is helping him multi-task.)
Point: Will stop and dance to almost any genre of music with the exception of yodeling.
Counterpoint: Has also perfected the tantrum dance of clenched fists, stomping feet, and chin raised in defiant wailing which can last in excess of ten minutes (a lot longer than it sounds).
Point: Still likes to cuddle while having a bed time bottle (yes, I know she is too old for it)
Counterpoint: Refuses to eat while sitting in the high chair and prefers to walk around approaching other diners like a baby bird with her mouth wide open, hoping we will drop something in.
Conclusion: We'll keep her around. That which doesn't kill us, only makes us stronger.
Stop grinding on Jesus
2 days ago