Halloween 2010 Recap

Coming up for a breath of fresh fall air between Halloween and Christmas. Instead of a long-winded and boring journal entry, I'll recap by the numbers.

October 23

50 bales of hay thrown into loft. Okay, so Scott threw and I stacked. Okay, so John stacked the majority and I supervised.

2 kittens named. In a burst of un-feral abnormalcy, two of this year's kittens are actually allowing the girls to catch and hold them. Even though Zoe's idea of cuddling is a Lou Ferigno sleeper hold. Morgan has dubbed them Fickey and Mickey. She pretends to be able to tell them apart.

October 24

8 adults arrive in Halloween-themed clothing to celebrate Scott's birthday. My idea. I'm cool like that. (This includes 2 grown men in Goonies Never Say Die t-shirts.)

October 27

101 Portrait Innovation pictures taken. Somehow managed to narrow down to 8, but I got the CD for free, which means technically I have all 101.

October 29

1 kindergarten costume parade. 25% Star Wars, 30% Princess, 15% Fairy, 10% Athletes, 10% Toy Story, 10% Public Servant.

1 trip to Costco. 2 balloons from Red Robin. 1 massive stomach ache.

October 30

1 werewolf that scared the bejeezus out of Zoe. (Thank you, Uncle John.) After convincing her that it was only Whitney in a mask, we headed out to the Merchant Trick or Treat parade where I begged Malley's to give my children extra candy for me. "Treats" included: 1 pass to Pace Fitness for an adult (?), sugar free candy and toothbrush from the dentist (come on!), some "organic" candy (isn't that an oxymoron? i didn't even chance it. straight in the garbage.). I personally feel that KeyBank should have been giving dollar bills, but that's just me.

2 trips to the bounce house at the PTA party for Zoe, who until that day had been terrified of them. 4 crafts made that are still sitting on the floor of my car. 1 of which includes the emptied contents of half an Elmer's glue bottle, so now pretty much anything that ends up on the floor of the passenger side is stuck.

250 fish fried by Uncle Mike to celebrate a visit from the Maryland contingent of the family. 50 song requests for Cousin Jake's guitar, only 5 of which he actually knew. Jefferson Airplane's "Somebody to Love" being the overall favorite of the little ones.

1 trip to the drive through beverage at 11:30 pm...for milk...because Aunt Charlie - despite inviting the whole famn damily over - only maintains Lactaid in her refrigerator.

October 31

1 more Swigart family visit...just to round things out for the day.

46 degrees outside at 6pm. Official tricks or treats start time.

7th and final appearance of Dorothy. 3rd and final appearance of Shirley Temple. Dorothy refuses to wear a coat. I give up.

26 full-sized candy bars dispensed. Typically, we have about 5 kids come to our house because our road is too busy for the little ones and there are way too many other neighborhoods serving beer. We believe the influx may have been caused by Mo Williams opening his gates across the street. Like the Pied Piper of Hamilton, kids could hear him calling from blocks away.

10 pounds of candy. 1 pound donated by Morgan for kids who can't trick or trick..."Mommy, did you know there are places in this world where it is not safe?" What's a holiday, without a lesson in morality.

Until next year, rest in peace.

The Sincere Pumpkin Patch

Those that know me, know that Halloween is my favorite holiday. Some of which has to do with happy childhood memories of Trick-or-Treating with the North Main Street gang and my mom’s excellent costume making talent. Some has to do with the weather, because fall is my favorite season. And some has to do with It’s the Great Pumpkin, Charlie Brown – arguably the best reason to stay up past my bedtime.

As a side note…I actually hate haunted houses. I am genuinely afraid that one of the workers will end up being a psychopathic axe murderer and this is just his cover. Irrational? Yes.

Now that I have kids of my own, there is a whole new level to the giddiness I feel when decorating a jack-o-lantern.

First off, I think Halloween is now in competition with Christmas for busiest time on my calendar. There are the preparations – the pumpkin picking, costume design, and hayrides. There are the planned festivities – PTA parties, parades, Boo at the Zoo, and more hayrides. And there is the holiday itself – trick-or-treat and more hayrides.

Note to hayride operators – Putting bales of STRAW in a wagon and pulling it around a parking lot with a tractor does not constitute a hayride. I’m not against the straw usage, per se. I wouldn’t want to use my own hay either – the stuff isn’t cheap. I was merely pointing out the misconception. But if you aren’t going to pull me through spooky cornfields or wooded areas, then it’s just a plain ol’ tractor/wagon ride.

The costume design is always tricky, as I am not as handy with the sewing machine as my mother was. Wait…I don’t even own a sewing machine. And how can store-bought costumes be so expensive and so cheap at the same time? Plus, Morgan already has definitive ideas on what she wants to be, despite my Jedi mind tricks. “Wouldn’t it be great to put a sheet over your head? It would be so fun to go as a ghost. I love ghosts.”

But in the end, they look so damn cute. At the PTA party, I was taking random pictures of kids I didn’t know. It is impossible to resist a child in costume. Unless they are a screaming little brat, of course.

Speaking of the PTA party…this year, Jungle Terry came from the zoo with some animal friends. We stepped into the Middle School cafeteria and I turned to Scott and said, “Does Zoe need her diaper changed?” He of course looked at me like I was an idiot and pointed to the cages on the stage.

Ahhh…animals smell. I’m normally immune to that, seeing as I did grow up with horses, but there was perhaps the fact that the smell of snake pee and pigeon poop are slightly out of context in a room where large numbers of children eat. But Jungle Terry did bring a mega bottle of hand sanitizer with him, which I thought was considerate.

On another side note…two out of the twenty animals he brought with him were albino - an albino skunk and an albino python. What are the chances that 10% of your menagerie is allegedly the rarest of their species? Seems a little fishy.

So here are the remaining “to do” items. I’m not kidding. This is seriously how long the list is. (Okay, so I may have a little something to do with signing myself up for this stuff.)

Carve another set of pumpkins, because the ones we did at the beginning of the month with the cousins have caved in with mold. They are still sitting on my front porch, of course. But I thought maybe they should be replaced before anyone other than the mailman has to get a good look at them.

The pre-school party and parade on Friday. Yet another opportunity for me to take pictures of other people’s kids and berate myself for not making Morgan’s costume myself.

The Nature Center hayride and festivities on Friday night. This hayride looks promising, because it does get down into the Metropark area. And you can’t pass up a chance to pet more animals. Although I’m pretty sure the nature center is seriously deficient on the albino variety.

Saturday is the merchant Trick-or-Treat parade at 1pm. The kids get to walk around the two town shopping squares and get candy from the store owners and it forms a sort of parade. (This will be cutting it close to swim lessons, but I think we can do it. May be a new record for most activities in a single day.)

6pm is actual Trick-or-Treat. The best part is seeing which houses are giving out beer to the parents as they walk by. And checking off each of the Star Wars characters that I see. Some things never change. And it will be interesting if Morgan can talk to home owners at a level that is actually audible to the human ear.

Then there is the annual Barn Dance, back at my old stomping grounds - which is now in its second generation, and does include an actual square-dance caller. Plus you get to see which kid falls off the mountain of straw bales first, thus ending the fun for the rest of them.

And then I will be setting up camp in the “most sincere” pumpkin patch.