Wednesday, October 19, 2011

The Greatest Show On Earth

Author’s Note: I started this yesterday…then I did the thing I never do. I watched news. Ugh. I tell you what. If I just watched the news I would have something to blog about every day.

I missed the elephants AGAIN. Every October, I tell myself I am going to get downtown in time to watch them walk from the train station to the arena. And every year, I forget.

As I got back to the parking garage, there stood the big Ringling Brothers trucks. There was even a whiff of elephant in the air. But nope, while the pachyderms were marching, I was interviewing smarty-pants accounting majors for internship positions.

I mean…who needs to finish a double major in Accounting and Economics in three years while on an athletic scholarship for Division 1 football? That’s just plain showing off and I won’t stand for it!

Plus, get your butt over to a Big Four and rake in the big bucks! At least until you want to jump out a 20th story window. You could be auditing the circus. I mean someone has to count the inventory, right? Although, is an elephant considered a fixed asset?

Please hold while I determine if Ringling Brothers is a publicly traded company…nope. Okay, so that idea won’t work.

Political Apathy

I have been apathetic ever since I graduated with a Political Science degree. Why? Mainly because I came to the realization that a two-party system can’t get anything done that will actually benefit real people like me.

So what possessed me to watch the Republican debate last night? It could be the love-hate relationship that Scott and I have with Anderson Cooper. I love him, he hates him. I don’t know. But I got sucked in by the Sarah Palin look-a-like and the bickering and Cain’s ability to let the 9-9-9 plan attacks roll right off him.

Hey…this might be why I became a Political Science major in the first place.

They are all idiots in varying degrees, of course. Who else would subject themselves to that kind of public stoning? Might be my new obsession, but I promise not to blog about it.

Mom Salary

Apparently there is a mom that is trying to get something in the works that makes husbands give 10% of their salary to their SAHM wives as payment for their services.

Huh? I’m not saying that being a mom isn’t work. But don’t you already share ALL of your husband’s salary? How else would you have food, clothing and shelter? So is the 10% for discretionary spending on yourself? If so, does he get 10% discretionary spending on himself? I just don’t get it.

Scott and I both work outside the home, but I don’t keep my salary separate from his. It all goes in one place. How is being a stay at home mom different? Feel free to comment, ladies. I know you are reading this.

Exotic Pets

Don’t do it! That’s all I have to say about that.

The Moss Man

Oh, local news. The Moss Man was multi-tasking this morning - preparing some stir-fry while giving his movie review. This morning was a review of The Three Musketeers based on the book by Alexander Dumas.

Dumas. It’s French by the way. And therefore not pronounced Doom-ahz. The “s” is silent, Dumb Ass.

Also, he made sure to note that it is actually about four musketeers. Um…no, David. D’Artagnan WANTS to be a musketeer. He is not. So it really is about THREE musketeers. I promise. They aren’t doing fuzzy math.

I want to note that I have never read The Three Musketeers. But I am literate enough to understand the story, and even if I wasn’t, it just proves he didn’t actually watch the movie.

4 comments:

  1. Have to admit I've become increasingly apathetic about politics for exactly the same reason(s). As for the SAHM and the 10%, that reminds me of olden times when a husband would give his wife "pin money." I swear I even remember Mama Swigart making a reference to it.

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  2. I don't know. It's starting to become enought like reality TV (a la Real Housewives) to get me interested again. Yes, I realize that is not a good thing!

    Pin money, huh? Term sounds vaguely familiar. I will have to google it.

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  3. Mama & Papa took Katie and me to the circus when we were little. We were so close to the elephants that when one took a huge crap (the size of my head) and then peed (power-hose style), the urine ricocheted off the crap and onto us. I have no desire to get that close to elephants again..

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